>Selfstuck: Begin

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: I'm sure it's no biggie! I mean you can always just wake up, right?
EH: Oooooh we could do with some 'making stuff.' Maybe it manufactures this 'Grist' business? We only have twenty.
EH: Luuuuuuckily, there are a few more free ones!

>Glen: Deploy Cruxtruder

They probably didn't need that bathroom anyway.

>Deploy Totem Lathe

One less master bedroom, coming right up...

>Deploy Pre-Punched Card

Aw, this one's too little. Maybe you can find another way to mess up the lawn.

Quote :

ML: I'm like maths percent sure this isn't a dream.
ML: Now fix my house before I bunch you in the nose.

>Josh: Run around in search of the pre-punched card.

Quote :

ML: You need to bounce something off the top of the cruxtruder.
ML: The machine with the tubey looking thing on top.
ML: But once you do the countdown will start.
ML: So yeah.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Countdown? What countdown? o:
EH: Oh well, I'm sure it won't be too important in any way whatsoever. >3<
EH: Lemme just.

>Glen: Open cruxtruder in most logical way possible

By cutting out a section of the ceiling above, you cause a chair to fall onto the CRUXTRUDER lid - AND regain BUILD GRIST! Now that is efficiency.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Woah, I see what you mean about the countdown!
EH: I hope you know what you're doing, we've only got seven minutes :3
EH: Additionally, the hex is that red glowy thing that came out of the canister?

Quote :

ML: That red glowy thing is a kernal sprite, or something like that.
ML: I need to put something in it.
ML: So let me just.

>Josh: put something in it

You go to the wall where a painting of a mermaid resides.

Quote :

ML: Ally-oop

And thus mersprite was born.

Quote :

ML: The faqs I read said you can prototype twice, but only one time is necessary, I'll probably prototype again later, but no point on wasting time on that now.
ML: Where did you put the pre-punch card. I kind of need it.

>Rick: Check iPester for faqs

Flick and jab and smudge the screen of your device all you like, there are no faqs to find. You eventually decide to give up and shove the device back into your pocket, eventually reaching the rather empty room containing your COMPUTER. You sit down upon the BROKEN COMPUTER CHAIR, which is so broke that it became a LAVISH COMPUTER STOOL, and push the power button, causing the machine to slowly wirr to life. Knowing your computer, you have a good several minutes before it actually starts to be in any workable position.

As the screen slowly draws some power into itself, you look down and notice a notebook lying on the desk. Ah, yes, these were notes for your far too complex for anyone’s good highly thought out and innovative roleplay, NEXUS. You definitely a great deal of thought into it: the story of HORRIFYINGLY COLOSSAL ALIENS and their hunt for FACETS OF ASPECTS OF THE UNIVERSE. You must admit that you have quite a fondness for the ELDRITCH AND LOVECRAFTIAN.

However, RPPROJECT, the prime site in which you and your friends attend and had essentially made yourselves, is not known for producing finished RPs. In fact, this case was even more devastating, as this RP DIDN’T EVEN BEGIN THE STORY. Really, people had definitely expressed interest and planned on joining, like Glen, AS, and EM, but it was just too large for such a small site. You have decided to later adapt it for a book series.

Before you can continue musing over your Roleplay, a loud screeching shrieked from your driveway, the smell of flaming rubber hitting the side of your house like a tank. After that explosive episode, a knock immediately came from the door.

>Rick: Answer

You hop off the LAVISH COMPUTER STOOL, take a tread through the hallway, and open the door to find your NEIGHBOR, her early-twenty-something demeanor readily apparent, beginning with a victorious grin on her face. “Heyyyyyyy Rick. So get this: I didn’t ram my car into the garage!”

You smile and take a step outside, noticing that her car was parallel-parked dangerously close your garage. Of course, you let her borrow your garage for her automobile of choice (which of course is a glaringly hot pink Ferrari, further showing her LUDICROUS GUILE in obtaining LUDICROUS THINGS), seeing that you aren’t legally allowed to drive, the space was already there, and she needed a place to park (Igloos are notorious for not handling heat well).

“Impressive!” You exclaim, congratulating her for not applying any more dents to the thing. As you both appear to about to head back to your own devices after this brief encounter, you remember that your computer isn’t exactly healthy, so you might need to obtain a spare computer. “Say,” you begin, just as the girl turned around, “can I borrow your laptop? I just need it for this literary project.”

She smiled and waved, “Oh sure! Just make sure to take a good look at where you’re holding the thing. Now then,” she began, turning to her left-hand side and pointing at the woods next to your house, “I’ma go continue my search for a polar bear to hug. See yah later!” And with that, she simply dashed off into the woods.

And the lady who did not do her research just dashed off into the woods to hug polar bears. It would always disturb you when she would just dash off into the woods.

And hug polar bears.

==>

After a bit of a trek across the country road, you eventually reach her IGLOO. Now, most igloos are just half-spheres with an entrance. This one was shaped as quite a large 2 story house. However, you withhold your impression and walk through the icy door, entering the foyer, which lead to the living room. Walking into the room, you noticed on a coffee table made of ice her laptop.

You walk over to the table and absent-mindedly grab the FAPTOP, then simply proceeding to make you-

((Appropriate Listening: ))

Wait…

… … … FAPTOP?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

FUGASHBLARGHQUICKDOOROPENYESARGHEWNEIGHBORJIZZCOATING
BLARGHOHDEARGODTHAT’SNEVERCOMINGOUTOHGOSHYOURBEAUTIFULCOATANDOHDOUBLEGOSHIT’SALLOVERYOURHAAAAAANDS
CRAPYOUSTILLHAVEA1/2MILETOGOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHOHGOSHTHESMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLTHEEEEEESMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

YOUHAVENOWLOSTALLABILITYARTICULATEBECAUSEYOUCANNOTGETOVERTHEFACTTHATYOURAREHOLDINGTHEFAPTOP
OHGOSHGRANDADYOUTOLDHIMYOUWANTEDASYLLADEXFORCHRISTMASBUTNOOOOOOOOO
YOUHADTOGETSOMEINCREDIBLYSTERILEGLOVESTHATYOUNOWSUPPOSEYOUSHOULDHAVEBROUGHTBECAUSEATLEASTTHENYOURHANDSWOULDN’TBECOVEREDINNEIGHBORJIZZ

ONLYSEVERALYARDSLEFTOHGOSHYOURHANDSARENOWLUDICROUSLYSTICKYINWHITECREAMOFAMOSTDUBIOUSORIGIN
DOORPLEASECOMEQUICKERINTOVIEWOHGOSHALMOSTTHEREJUSTDON’TTHROWUPDON’TTHROWUPYOUBUSTTHROUGHTHEDOORYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH

*Bedoop*

Oh hey your computer is up and someone just pestered you on it.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Is that an actual mermaid now?
EH: This game is. This game is the best game in-bleedin'-ever.
EH: Oh, the ah, the card?
EH: I think I left it under the rug in your room. Well, it was a rug, at any rate.
EH: I'm not quite sure how I lost that thing, actually. o:
EH: Eh, it'll turn up! >3<

>Glen: Observe happenings

Doesn't seem to be a lot going on. You go AFK for a minute and grab a Vroot Juice.

> Give up on password

You vehemently refuse to surrender so easily! you'll figure it out you just need some time to think, is all! Yeah, that's it...

> Adopt standard thinking posture

You quickly run outside and hop onto your bike, though not before retrieving your towel. You begin your HOUR LONG BIKE RIDE. nothing like 26 kilometers to get the brain juices flowing.

> OHGODWHATWASTHAT

AAAAAAGHOHGODSOMETHINGJUSTEXPLODEDAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!

> flee post-haste.

You turn and flee in the opposite direction, and proceed to crash your bike into a tree.

Brilliant.

Quote :

ML: You are shitting me right.
ML: You find that fucking card right now
ML: Or so help me
ML: Well I won't help me
ML: BECAUSE I'LL BE DEAD.

>Omni: Flip your shit

and by shit you mean couch. You do this. Oh look there it is.

>Omni: Turn the wheel

You turn the wheel on the cruxtruder and extrude a totem.

Quote :

ML: Where did you put everything?
ML: Why couldn't you just make this easy and put everything close together.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Pssssh where's the fun in that!
EH: I figured I might at least make this difficult for you. >:3
EH: I mean, the game ends in like three minutes according to this countdown and you're like, almost done. I think.
EH: Say, what happens if you lose? o:

>Glen: Locate card anyway

Something seems odd about this whole situation. You'd best abide by Josh's words.

>Flip carpets

Well it's not in his room. Or his parents' room. Or the living room.

>Destroy floors

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Hmm...
EH: Okay, quick Q!
EH: Which is more imperative, finding this card or preserving your house's real estate value? o3o;

Quote :

ML: What part of "BECAUSE I'LL BE DEAD" didn't you understand.
ML: I thought that was pretty straight forward
ML: Seeing as you can build my house and fix it and what have you, someone how I think it'd be a bit more important to find that card.
ML: So please, for the love of god
ML: And all that is holy
ML: Find that fucking card.

> crawl out of mangled wreck

You're not sure you'd use the word "mangled". The bike is essentially fine, just lying on the ground. As are you, somewhat surprisingly. You pick yourself up, and turn in the direction of the cloud of smoke rising off a nearby crater

> examine impact crater

You quickly scrabble to the edge of the crater to find that, in the ruins of what was once a house, there now stands... a wooden box, untouched by the impact of a large and now seemingly disintegrated meteorite.

This strikes you as strange.

> enter crater

Of course you aren't going to climb down into that crater! It could be radioactive and at the very least is assuredly incredibly hot, not to mentioooooonnnn...

> ?

The ground gives way beneath you, dumping you directly into the center of the crater, coming to a rest with your back to the chest, which immediately breaks at the contact.

> examine released contents

The chest contained a large, black bike helmet, with Grey strips and a strange visor that covers your eyes, allowing you to... see? You're really not sure what the point of it is.

Also in the chest was a note written in what is either your handwriting or an alien language. You can't be sure which.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Oh. o:
EH: Sorry... Dx

Mayhaps this game is a bit more serious than you thought.

>Redeploy

Yeah that card's a goner. Since they're free, you just drag out a new one - it flutters to the ground to land at Josh's feet.

You honestly don't know why you didn't just do that earlier.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Okayso...
EH: Since you clearly have at least some idea what you're doing...
EH: (Which is more knowledge than I posses >3<; )
EH: ...I guess we should probably work together!
EH: Like. What happens now? o:

Quote :

ML: Now I have to take this card and this totem to the totem lathe, whereever the hell you put that you raging pyschopath.
ML: I swear it's like you're trying to get me killed.

>Josh: Calm down, it's just a game

A game that'll get me kill you annoying ass voice in my head. Go bother someone else for once.

>Josh: That's not very nice.

It's not supposed to be nice, I'm trying not to die here and you're like "Laddee fuckin da, let me tell this kid what to do."

Quote :

ML: Mata, come on
ML: This is serious.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Uhhh... Yeah, sorry, sorry. >3<;
EH: The um, the totem thingy is in the master bedroom I think.
EH: Wherethebedusedtobe. >o<;

>Glen: Rearrange more furniture

I think Josh has had about enough of that. You need to find something else to do to occupy your time.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: So...
EH: You do or do not know what happens once you've done all this totemcardthingystuff before the countdown runs out? o:
EH: Because like, you've only got a few minutes. -A-;

Quote :

ML: I'm not entirely sure, no one has ever made it that far.
ML: Wish me luck.

>Josh: Lathe that totem. You put the prepunched card in the slot as well as the totem and watch as it chips away at the totem.

>Josh: Downwards

You run with the totem down to the alchemiter and pop it in. Out comes.

A square peg, a circular hole, and a knife.

Quote :

ML: You are shitting me.

At first you just try and fit the peg in the hole, naturely it doesn't, so you begin to viciously cut away at the square peg.

Quote :

EH: Ohgawsh! Sixty seconds!
EH: I don't even know what you're doing, but do it quick!
EH: HURRYGOGOGO

>Glen: Offer assistance

You're too crap at this game to do anything useful! All you can do is watch in anticipation as the counter goes down and neat little red wood-shavings populate the floor...

>Josh's Arms: Fall off

You honestly feel like you're about to.

>Peg: Slowly Become circle

You are the shittiest circle you think you've ever seen, and that's saying something because you're a peg and you can totally see.

The peg finishes becoming circular in shape.

>Josh: SLAM DUUUUUUUUUNK

YOU SLAM THAT SHIT LIKES IT'S THE BREAKS OF YOUR CAR AND THERE IS A PERSON ON THE STREET AND YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL.
THAT IS TO SAY
HARD.

>Glen: Much rejoicing

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
EH: Two seconds to spare! {: D
EH: Like the ending of 'Around the World in Eighty Days!'
EH: Not the movie version, the book.
EH: Though the movie version had Jackie Chan.
EH: But this was even COOLER than that.
EH: Whathappensnow? o3o
EH: Oh wait you said you didn't know.
EH: Also.
EH: Where the devil is your house? o:

>Examine surroundings

Admittedly, all you can see of the outside is a weirdish glow from the window, and you don't think you'll be able to navigate the camera there until Josh sees it himself. Best leave the explorations up to him!

>Rick: Answer Pesterer

You seem to be rather busy with the cleaning of your hands after that foul episode.

==>

Now that that’s over with, the hideous FAPTOP having been placed on a table to be cleaned later, you sit upon the LAVISH COMPUTER STOOL and stare at the screen. Now, you stared most likely because of who exactly was trying to pester you. Of course, why did it have to be… him, now, at all times? Why couldn’t it just be any of your old buddies in RPP? Why him?

It’s not that you outright hated him, oh no. The fact that you two still communicate is proof of this. You forget how you two actually met, but you wish it would have never happened. The reason, of course, is that he deeply unnerves you.

You two share several similar INTERSTS AND HOBBIES, and enjoy discussing them with each other. In fact, the amount of interests shared between you two is frighteningly high, and you two share several PERSONALITY QUIRKS to boot, making the similarities all the more apparent. However, you two definitely differ in psychology and morals; it’s almost like looking at some kind of evil counterpart of yourself…

However, you decide that instead of avoiding it, it would be best to get the conversation over with. It’s time to face your demons head on. You move the cursor and open the Pesterlog.

(( Appropriate Listening: ))

Quote :

—airedOriginator [AO] began pestering objectionableAnomaly[OA] –

OA: GREETINGS, Rick.
AO: ‘Lo, Bobb.
OA: HOLD IT, before we continue, if your last message to me was correct, then I can assume that you and your pals had; I can’t believe I’m saying this; actually imported a copy of SBURB from development and are now about to play the thing.
OA: This is actually quite astounding to me in that not only is that a legendary accomplishment in and of itself, but my own circle of acquaintances have done the exact same thing, and we had previously planned to begin a session tomorrow.
OA: Really, I’ve seen plenty of coincidences before, this just takes the coincidentally-placed-there coincidence cake. Bravo, AO. You are truly an impressive character.
AO: Well… thank you! In all actuality, it was BE who did it; I just tagged along to play.
OA: OBJECTION, never mind that. I’m sure you had some hand in it.
OA: Now then, I just wanted to check up with you on that. I have to get back to communicating with my acquaintances. Planning for the session and all. I would love some insight on what the game is like once you’re finished.
AO: Say, I notice that you keep calling your friends ‘acquaintances’. Any reason for that? Throughout my conversations with you, you don’t seem to give them a lot of regard.
AO: I mean, these are the guys and gals who you’re about to have a full blown cooperative session with. It would probably be best to put a little trust in them.
OA: TAKE THAT. Cooperation? With these assholes? Hah, if you’ve ever seen them, you’ll know that none of us can be cooperating without one side wanting to try and one-up or backstab the other. Just for chuckles and funsies.
AO: You sure? Because if I remember correct than your friends and mine sound an awful lot alike.
AO: So, for the purpose of metaphor and my reference, I’ll say that my friends and I are actually clones of you and your pals.
AO: Have you guys only recently banded together? I remember that when I first joined up with my group they came off as smug, but over the years we’ve all mellowed out and gotten to know each other better.
OA: … Admittedly, it has been only a short while since we’ve known each other, having all joined up to participate in this one Roleplay…
OA: Of course, I know enough of them. And from what I can see, they are either smug jerks or sleazy punks. Usually a combination of the two.
OA: But enough of that. It seems my time is up, and I must return to the planning. Ciao, AO.

-- objectionableAnomaly [OA] ceased pestering airedOriginator [AO] –

You sit back, elbow on the desk and head in your hands. There is just something really suspicious about him… Nonetheless, you grab the SBURB discs from off the table adjacent to you and place one of them into the drive, watching as the download slowly began, the spirograph popping up and dancing before the screen.

>Aaron

read note

Quote :

I'm willing to bet you're wondering why this is here, how this note exists, and any number of essentially unanswerable questions. That's natural, and you should feel proud of your natural curiosity leading you to ask these insightful, if obvious, questions.

But that's not what this note is for. You'll find these answers in time, and when you do it'll be time to set this thing up. Confusing, I know. But whatever. What you need to know, and what I need to tell you, is that there are sources of information you'd never have thought to use, and that you shouldn't be shy in employing them. This helmet should be the first step along that path, though I'm sorry to say I can't say how, or why!

~sincerely, you

>message friend

You fire up pesterchum on your phone. Which is to say you open your phone.

Quote :

-- cursiveWrit [CW] began pestering beastlyExperimentor [BE] --
CW: I'm kind of freaking out here
CW: I just got a message from myself
CW: But from the future, and it came with an awesome looking bike helmet.

>Dave: Return to Laptop

You climb the stairs back to the gameroom. You kind of want to put off LEMONADE-MAKING because it is a bit NOISY, and makes a small MESS, which you'd have to clean up. You return to your computer, and find Aaron has just started pestering you.

God, you can't get a minute of peace right now, can you? You suppose that's the consequence to coordinating this whole game thing though. Better see what he wants.

>Dave: Respond

Quote :

-- cursiveWrit [CW] began pestering beastlyExperimentor [BE] --
CW: I'm kind of freaking out here.
BE: Why?
CW: I just got a message from myself.
CW: But from the future, and it came with an awesome looking bike helmet.
BE: Yeah, cool.
CW: ...
CW: "cool"? that's all you think to say?
BE: I think you're overanalyzing things.
BE: Sure, found a new bike helmet.
CW: I'm overanalyzing things
CW: Because I got a note from my future self
BE: Sure, found a note you probably left yourself in the past joking you're from the future to yank your own chain.
BE: I leave myself notes all the time. Not like friendly reminders and shit either.
CW: I think I may have forgotten to include a crucial detail.
CW: I found these things in the middle of a massive hole made by a meteorite that struck down in front of me while I was riding my bike
BE: ...
BE: Are you fucking high right now or something?
BE: Are you going to be blathering nonsense the entire game?
BE: Because I really don't want to put up with that shit.
CW: Do I really strike you as the kind of person to do drugs?
BE: As of now, I hope so.
CW: I am not on drugs
BE: It's either that or you banged your head up pretty bad in a bike crash.
CW: I am also not crazy
CW: Nah, I and the bike came out okay.
BE: Crazy people usually don't admit to being crazy.
CW: I think... I think I'm gonna put the helmet on
BE: Sure.
BE: You do that.
CW: One second...
CW: What in the... woah!
CW: hey!
CW: It's like...
CW: what...
BE: I'm going to leave you in make believe land, and you can just continue having epiphanies about things that aren't there.
CW: oh shush
BE: Seeing as I have a game to organize.
BE: ME, SHUSH?
CW: Listen, this is serious
CW: The freaking thing has like
CW: I don't even know, wierd see-through screens
CW: and it's displaying pesterchum on it
BE: You mean A VISOR?
BE: AS YOU LOOK AT YOUR PHONE?
BE: My GODS, it's a motherfucking MIRACLE.
CW: No, I mean
BE: You mean you banged your head up bad, huh?
CW: I hate your sarcasm sometimes.
BE: Listen, keep spouting nonsense, but please do it to someone else.
CW: and also? Cynisism does not become you.
BE: I don't think Cynisism suits anyone. It's not a word.
CW: Well FINE. Be that way. But you'll see! You'll all see!
CW: hee.
CW: Okay, sorry, that was bad.
CW: Oh, yeah, laugh it up, I made a spelling mistake.
CW: I'm kind of stressed, and one of my friends thinks I'm insane. I think I'm entitled!
BE: I'm sorry, but taking the intellectual highground while making a typo in one of your own insults is asking for burning retaliation.
BE: As to thinking your insane, I prefer "confused".
BE: Why don't you clear your head, and let me continue setting up game stuff?
CW: I do believe you mean "you're", as in "you are". I do not believe it is possible to own the concept of insanity.
BE: Ah, thank you.
BE: See, I'm not going to be mad or humiliated there.
CW: Anyway, I think I will talk to someone else, someone whose first reaction won't be "You're crazy bro".
BE: By all means.
CW: "are you high?", sorry. Don't want any more embarasing gaffs, do we?
-- cursiveWrit [CW] changed their mood to RANCOROUS --
BE: Sorry, but I feel this is obligatory.
BE: *mbarrassing
BE: *embarrassing
BE: Oh sweet irony.
BE: Seems my sick burn ran cold.
CW: Oh god.
BE: I'll give you the point there.
CW: Just a tad.
CW: Anyway, I'll see you later.
BE: Ciao. Hope you feel better!
-- beastlyExperimentor [BE] ceased pestering cursiveWrit [CW] --

==>

Right then, got that over with, and your CYNIC'S GAMBIT hasn't really changed. You suppose no change beats bad change though. Glad you saved yourself on the typo by catching it yourself before ol' Douglas.

You guess maybe now would be a good time to- OH GOD NOT HER AGAIN.

YOU JUST WENT THROUGH THIS.

>Dave: Respond to AE

Quote :

-- arcaneEquinox [AE] began pestering beastlyExperimentor [BE] --
AE: hey
AE: dunkass
BE: Oh for fuck's sake.
AE: guess what
BE: DIDN'T WE JUST DISCUSS THIS?
BE: I CAN LITERALLY GO THROUGH MY LOGS RIGHT NOW.
AE: y didnt u
AE: tell me
BE: I TOLD YOU LATER.
AE: weRE U PLANNIN
AE: oN LEAVIN ME OUT OR SOMETHIN????
BE: What are you even TALKING about?
AE: the fuckin game
BE: I told you, LATER.
AE: no
BE: What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
BE: Are you disputing that I said that?
AE: it means no i want 2 kno now
BE: Too bad.
AE: oh hell no
AE: dont make me
AE: come over there
BE: Enjoy the hour long drive.
AE: i kno the vague vicinity of where u live
BE: Or however long it'd take by foot.
AE: omfg just
AE: tell me ok
BE: I don't quite see WHY.
BE: To appease your demand and whim like you're royalty?
BE: I can't fathom how much of a spoiled brat you are.
AE: idK BECAUSE I HGET MAD WHEN PEOPLE WITHHOLD INFO????
AE: yes actually i aM royalty
AE: im related to charlemagne did u kno that
BE: Oh boy! I'd better straighten myself out then!
AE: nOW I DEMAND ANSWERS
AE: ROYAL ANSWERS
BE: Best be lying prostrate before my sovereign!
AE: giVE ME THE ANSWERS, SQUIRE
BE: I should just get down on my fucking knees right now and spill it, shouldn't I?
AE: yes
BE: Whelp, I guess there's not much else to do.
BE: Well, the story is...
BE: LATER.
-- beastlyExperimentor [BE] ceased pestering arcaneEquinox [AE] --

You finish the conversation with a fantastic boost to your CYNIC'S GAMBIT. This thing isn't really just to track cynical-ness. It's in charge of general SNARK and SMART-ASS-Y-NESS as well. Like a HORSE-SHIT-O-METER, but GENTLEMANLY. You find it suits you quite well and- OH FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.

>Dave: Re-Respond to AE

Quote :

-- arcaneEquinox [AE] began pestering beastlyExperimentor [BE] --
AE: u stupid cunt
AE: get back here'
BE: No, see, I don't have one of those.
BE: That'd be you.
AE: omfg
AE: nO
AE: nonono
AE: im so done
BE: I was about to say you'd regained my attention for a moment, and had the chance to redeem yourself somehow through your choice of words.
BE: But those certainly weren't the words that did the trick.
AE: should i ask politely
AE: pls mister dave may i have some more ansers?
AE: answers* even
BE: The answer is this, then, seeing as I doubt I can remain on Pesterchum without your constantly nagging me on it anyways, and I need to be on it to coordinate this in the first place.
BE: We're playing a game.
BE: A group of our internet friends.
AE: like who?
BE: I was hoping to not include you for various reasons I'll keep private.
BE: Be lucky I'm telling you this much.
BE: It's just a few of our friends. Details unneeded.
AE: o k
BE: Seeing as I doubt I'll be able to endure your, for lack of a more fitting word, "pesterings", I'll let you play, I guess.
BE: But you go second to last.
AE: wow ok
BE: As in, you will not start playing until only you and the last person remain.
AE: yeah i got that
AE: whos last?
BE: Shae.
BE: Or Shawn, or whatever.
AE: omfg
BE: DL.
AE: cool
BE: Figured you'd enjoy that much, at least.
BE: But again, I'm emphasizing this.
AE: uwu
BE: Don't start playing until I tell you it's okay.
AE: what is the
AE: game tho
BE: SBURB.
AE: omfg
AE: for realsies
BE: A beta, of course.
AE: yessssssss
BE: A technically unreleased beta, at that.
AE: :O
BE: But nonetheless, friends came through, and we bask in the revelry of obtaining the game.
AE: awesommme
AE: hold on a sec cw's spoutin some weird shit
BE: Oh god, he picked YOU to confide in here?
AE: somethin about a crater
AE: wait he told u 2
BE: I swear, he's crashed his bike one too many times.
AE: pft
AE: but idk man
BE: His head must be as misshapen as a potato to get him blabbering this stuff.
BE: Don't tell me you believe any of this garbage?
AE: maybe he should wear the helmet he found
AE: idk
BE: He did.
AE: yet
BE: Then he acted like it was some cool robo computer-hat thing.
BE: I told you, he's nuts.
AE: he just told me that
BE: And I'm talking to you on this.
BE: That's saying something.
BE: Just, you know.
AE: y u gotta be so mean 2 me dave
BE: Take what he says with a metric shitton of salt.
AE: idk....
BE: As for the terms of our friendship... Irrelevant.
BE: Now then.
BE: Wait for my go and the like.
AE: kk
BE: Which will be, as I noted previously, in other conversations, LATER.
BE: Ciao.
AE: finnnne
-- beastlyExperimentor [BE] ceased pestering arcaneEquinox [AE] --

>Dave: Just as Planned, Right?

You guess. You were hoping she wouldn't be such a prat and just leave herself out of your business, but you suppose that hope wasn't properly taking into account the subject at hand.

> Calm down

You're calm! you're the very picture of calm! Why, if calm were...
Yeah, who're you kidding. you're pretty hyper and angry. But at least you're putting that energy to good use by biking home.

> Message someone whose more likely to actually listen to you

Hmmm... him? no... what about her? wait, what were you thinking, no freaking way...
Oh! of course! It's so obvious!

Quote :

-- cursiveWrit [CW] began messaging arcaneEquinox [AE] --
CW: Before we begin, I need you to make a promise.
AE: oh uh
AE: ok
CW: Promise me you will listen to what I have to say, and try to help me, without assuming I have some kind of drug and/or mental problem.
AE: pfffft
AE: yeah sure ok
CW: You can't go back on this. It's kind of important, and it may be harder than you think.
AE: i wont
AE: prolly
CW: Okay, so, first thing I need to tell you is that meteorite hit a house, like, 20 feet away from me, and just completely destroyed it.
CW: Just one moment, house, next moment, crater.
CW: After that, I went to look in the crater, and there was this big box. Then I fell into the crater.
AE: uh oh
CW: don't worry, I'm fine
AE: oh good
CW: The box fell apart when I hit it, and there were two things inside- a helmet, and a note.
CW: The helmet is wierd. It's got a visor that works kind of but not quite like a computer
AE: :O[/color]
CW: I'm actually biking back to my house while I talk to you, which feels wierd. Especially because I'm not speaking out loud, and there is no keyboard.
CW: I have no idea how it works.
AE: woah cool
CW: yeah, now we get to the part where you think I'm crazy.
CW: The note was from me. But like... in the future. Or something.
CW: I'm not really sure, it was kinda vague.
AE: woah for real
CW: Yeah. DO NOT ask me how. I have no freaking idea.
CW: But it was my handwriting.
CW: noone could intentionally write that badly.
CW: I signed it "~sincerely, you"
AE: interestin
CW: Yep. I'm thinking the first thing I should do when I get home is check browsing history.
AE: :?
CW: I mentioned "sources I didn't know existed"
CW: but I figure future-me must have already found them
CW: And what better way to find out then by checking history?
CW: or future, I suppose...
AE: yeah
CW: BAH, I just learned it exists and I already hate time travel.
AE: >w<
CW: Anyway, my house is coming up, and I feel like I'm about to hit a marathon study period
AE: uh oh
CW: that is NOT a bad thing!
CW: I happen to like studying!
CW: And anyway, I'm looking up things for this game!
AE: oh ok
AE: have fun!
AE: i guess
CW: Would you like me to relay any additional information I uncover to you?
AE: sure!
AE: one thing tho
AE: you said game
AE: r u talkin bout sburb
CW: oh, of course!
AE: ok cool
AE: perfect
AE: question
CW: Yes?
AE: mind tellin me who else is playin
CW: um, me, you, Josh, Rick
CW: and...
CW: humm
CW: kails? maybe?
AE: josh is?
CW: I would assume.
CW: He is most knowledgeable, it would seem foolish to fail to include him.
AE: ok well that would explain y dave didnt want me 2 play
CW: Heh. I'm not sure he has any control over who gets in anymore.
CW: I think that's up to everyone else.
AE: >w<
AE: well anyway
AE: i hope u figure out what the note meant
CW: I think I know what it meant...
AE: ?
CW: It wasn't a lot of riddles
CW: I'm more concerned by how it came to be
CW: And how it got here
CW: and how it survived being involved in a freaking meteorite impact.
CW: seriously, what the hell, physics?
AE: lolol
-- cursiveWrit [CW] stopped messaging arcaneEquinox [AE] --

Okay, that conversation went better than the last one. You do feel like you fucked something up telling her Josh was involved, but your capacity to invest in worthless teen drama that does not directly involve you(and even some that does) is astonishingly low. So you completely fail to give a shit.

>Rick: Begin Sburb

With a right click and your cursor over the 'Open' button, you click the mouse and watch as the screens for the game slowly pop up upon the screen. Upon looking at the data storage, you find it almost unreal how little data the game takes, with your computer seeming to suffer no lag whatsoever. Bolstered by the fact that you're looking at the data readings WHILE the game is up.

Finally, after the loading screen is complete, it informs you of its connection to the other player. You observe the screen to see... a room? In that room seemed to be a young man, presumably around your age, wearing an incredibly nice fedora and a respectable pair of spectacles and OH WAIT THAT'S GLEN.

Quote :

-- airedOriginator [AO] began pestering erraticHorizon [EH] --

AO: Alright, so the game has started and now I'm looking at your room.
AO: ^Not too shabby!
AO: So yeah, essentially I have no idea what to do. I notice a set of options above my screen, so I'll just mess with those. Any objections?

>Glen: React

Oh dear sweet mother of all Rubix cubes, it's your turn to play. You can only hope that AO doesn't destroy your house as much as you did Josh's.

Pesterlog wrote:

EH: Hasi!
EH: Uhh... No, no, go right on ahead! ^^;
EH: From my, um, purely scientific experiments I conducted in, on, about, and generally all over Josh's house...
EH: I've deduced that you need to put down a bunch of all the free stuff first!
EH: First, I think it was the Cruxtruder? o:
EH: But yeah just. Go at your own pace, we're totes a team. o3o
EH: And some people are all like 'Hey man don't use that word,' but I think it perfectly describes the type of team we will be and are.
EH: Totes.
EH: Totes totes totes.~
EH: ...
EH: Please don't abrogate my house. ;3;

>Prepare for the inevitable

Oh gawsh he's watching your every move nothing is safe go, go make a pillow fort and hide until it's all over and the bathtub is broken into copacetically aesthetic little bits.

Quote :

AO: Abrogate? Like, what is this, a program that isn't controlling a well-made virtual form of your house, but rather your ACTUAL BLOODY HOUSE?
AO: ...
AO: I think I've fallen into the plot of either a terrible movie or a fantastic webcomic.
AO: ohwait, that reminds me.
AO: ^I still need to check and see if there's an update.^

You open Google Chrome and begin typing the url for mspaintadventures into the bar. You and your pals, along with a great many of people on your small forum, all share an interest in the comics on this site, and especially one in particular. An innovative webcomic, and writer Andrew Hussie's Magnum Opus, whose use of animated frames, beautifully made videos incorporating music, and even PLAYABLE FLASHGAMES, renders it as one of the most unique comics to ever appear on the Internet.

That's right, the Misadventures of the Midnight Crew!

However, as you click on the latest update, you're disheartened to see that it hasn't changed. It's understandable: now that Hussie's making an ENTIRE GAME after it, it's to be expected that he'd be busy.

Quote :

AO: Drat, nothing.
AO: Ah well.
AO: Anyways, whilst I check out these options, test to see exactly how reality-bending this game might be, and see what Yahoo all these News Sites are going berserk about, I need to ask how did the servering of Josh go.
AO: So...
AO: Yeah.
AO: How did the servering of Josh go?